Bacon and CrossFit: The final frontier

Posted: September 28, 2013 in Crossfit fashion, Crossfit Food, Crossfit Lifestyle
Tags: , ,

We were sitting around the other day after a particularly tough WOD, talking about food. Seems if we’re not talking about lifting or supplements or competitions, we’re talking about food.

And you can’t have a conversation about food without the topic of BACON coming up. Usually, it’s about how much bacon someone has consumed or some weird new pairing of bacon with another food: Bacon cookies, bacon cupcakes, bacon encrusted salmon.bacon-suit

After awhile, bacon discussions get kind of old. I mean really, it’s just a slice of pork in a vacuum-sealed plastic pouch. It’s not like a standing rib-road or brisket. I don’t even understand why bacon is so special to CrossFitters. How did the whole bacon obsession get started?

But this bacon conversation we were having while I was splayed out on the floor in a puddle of sweat did an abrupt about face when Matt, my coach, asked a question I had never heard before during a bacon conversation:

“Is there anything that wouldn’t taste better with bacon?” Matt asked.

We all went silent and you could see wheels spinning in everyone’s head.

“What would not taste better with bacon?” Matt asked. “I would eat ice cream with bacon.” We all agreed, bacon and ice cream sounded pretty damn good. It’s got that whole sweet and salty thang going on.

Bacon and yogurt? That would work. They put yogurt on the sliced lamb in a gyro, right? Bacon and apple pie? Oh man, that would be delicious. Bacon bits and M&Ms? I would eat that. Slices of watermelon wrapped in bacon? I’m drooling. What about bacon wrapped around a Twizzler. I would inhale that.

We could not come up with any food that would not taste better with bacon.BaconLady

Then one of the members who owns a really nice restaurant walked in and sat down on the rower. Matt walked up to him and popped the question: “Can you think of any food that wouldn’t taste better with bacon?”  The guy stopped rowing. You could see the little wheels turning in his head.

He started to say desserts but then he stopped himself. Who doesn’t love sweet and salty?

This debate went on for awhile but every time someone suggested a food, someone chimed in “I would eat that,” and we all nodded. Indeed, we would eat that, too.

Matt came very close to ending the debate when he said “toothpaste” but then the restaurant owner reminded him that you don’t eat toothpaste – at least you’re not supposed to, Matt.

I finally left. I had to go feed my dog, Dog, who happens to gets a slice of diced turkey bacon with every meal.

Lucky Dog.

It’s been a few days now and I haven’t come up with any food that would taste yucky with bacon. As with all things CrossFit, I’m spending way too much time thinking about bacon.

Please, help me out. Is there any food that would not taste better with bacon?

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